[Insert Witty Blog Title Here]

Task 1.1: Taking Stock

Well this definitely proved to be a more difficult task then I initially imagined it would be. The scary thing about Taking Stock of your life is that if you're not honest, you'll never get results. And looking yourself in the mirror and really asking "Where Am I?" "Where Do I Want to Be?" and possibly the hardest question of all..."Am I Happy?" is something that quite honestly made me sick to my stomach.

I mean who really wants to confront these questions when you could instead just busy yourself eating gummy bears, watching Iron Chef America, and floating on the lazy river of ignorant bliss. Wendy and I affectionately refer to this stage as "Autopilot," and after operating on "Autopilot" for the last year (or more), we decided to engage in this blog.

If the Taking Stock Portion of this project was a multiple choice test with the answers: A) Satisfied, B) Dissatisfied, C) Ask Again I Blacked Out, or D) Room for Improvement, Sister!--my answers would have been a resounding D) across the board.

For instance,

Job: Room for Improvement
Relationship With Man-Friend: Room For Improvement
Relationship With Mom/Sister: Room For Improvement
Goals: Room For Improvement
Personal Organization: (Not even applicable..I wish I could post a picture of my bedroom that is also a Scratch-N-Sniff)
Religious Viewpoint: Work in Progress...that wasn't a choice on the scantron, but I wrote it in.
Giving Back to the Community: Does recycling from time to time count?
Self-Awareness: A Bold and Italic Room for Improvement

I've been watching a lot of Food Network lately (not nearly as much as I did when I lived in NYC, but still more than the average...) and there is a new show called "The Best Thing I Ever Ate." After watching the show for a few minutes, it dawned on me that I can't recall what the best thing I ever ate is. Considering myself quite the epicurean, this really perplexed me. I love food, I cook food, my degree is in Hospitality Management, I spent a year in New York City selling marketing to some of the best restaurants in the country...and yet I'm coming up blank.

What the hell is that?

An extended survey into the realm of how little I'm actually acquainted with myself...I don't have a favorite color. Sure there are colors that I am partial to, some that I may even be inclined to over others, but none that I can wholeheartedly claim as my favorite.

And I get it...food, colors...it all seems very trivial, but it's a segue to much bigger issues. If I can't commit to a color, what else can't I commit to? If no delicious morsel of food stands out as the best thing to ever touch my lips (That's What She Said), what other memories are fading out of the scope of my memory?

So I accomplished the task, but it left me a little jaded. I guess change happens that way, you realize you're dissatisfied and resolve to change it. I think my problem mostly has been that in the last few years, I've let the people around me do the thinking, the accomplishing, and the living--and I've been alright with watching from my safe spot on the couch, just waiting for the ideal moment.

But as my friend Kevin taught me a long time ago, there is no ideal moment and there are no perfect circumstances. Sometimes you just need to take a leap of faith.

So today I resolve to engage in my own life, do some living, and maybe even some growing up, and I'll start that by opening a great bottle of wine, and ordering some Thai food...and who knows? Maybe it will be the best thing I ever ate.